2:54

Images from WeHeartIt.

This is what i'm thinking at 2:54 in the am on a Thursday night/Friday morning.

1. about my boyfriend who is killing imaginary enemies in the interactive world of xbox gaming
2. that the fact that someone three years my senior can manage to be as mature as someone four years younger than me. I find the hypocrisy in this startling. Not that I didn't know this about him before but it is still hard to come to terms with the fact that people never change. He will forever be a lost boy in this fast paced world. he will never realize his own ridiculous mentality. And I don't know why I still put up with it. Maybe it's because he was the first boy i really trusted. Loved. Was the first boy to break my heart and the first to make amends to me. I've been outgrowing him these past few years but I don't think I'll ever burn this bridge of ours.
3. the options for my tomorrow. I'm very excited to spend the day with my brother and uncle. I never see my uncle anymore. He used to live in NY and he recently moved to TN.
   much closer to my family's new home.
4. writing. Augh my muse has forsaken me. What's a writer to do when she can't write? i'm not sure but i've been reading and collaging and starting up a blog. Taking new photos and eating good food. I know if i want to keep up with it though i'm going to have to devote some time each week to writing a bit. This blog will help i'm sure.
5. Snow. I wish we could have a soft white muting blanket cover the landscape here but alas the climate doesn't allow it. I miss the snowy Decembers and Januarys I spent in IN. the chapped lips, the snow ball fights, the icicles, the red noses and cheeks, the comfy sweaters and jackets. The fire in our grate that we warmed ourselves by. Those were the winters i love to remember.
6. How i wish i could decide whether to save up for a new speedlite flash for my Canon or get a Diana.